My apologies... Hope this makes up for it.

Sorry I haven't blogged in a while. Let myself get a bit sidetracked with random hour at work and a minor holiday known as "eat all the stuff you can".

As my "please forgive me" gift to you, may I present THE QUEEN OF ALL TRAMP-STAMPS

If I came a-callin'...

So I came across this article from TIME Magazine about calling cards and am debating if it would be a suave idea for me to adopt. I am sometimes miffed that I don't get free business cards from work because I'm not an exec, yet all the time people ask me for my card.

I even went so far as to make a new, more professional e-mail address to put on the card rglass.phx@gmail.com...

Thus far, though, I've only found one example that I liked (see below), but don't feel great about dropping $150 on something that oddly shaped.

If you've got any ideas, let me know.

A Car that runs on What?!?

Would you drive one of these?

Reportedly it can go 60 miles on a tank of compressed air. Air, folks, air. That smog-filled crap we breathe every day, use it to power this escape-pod shaped sweet-ride of the future!

Get this, for Highway travel, this bad boy can go 800 miles by using a small motor to compress more air from outside the car as you go. The compressor motor will run on gasoline, ethanol, diesel, vegetable oil... so you could grab that salad dressing that's sitting on the door of your fridge and is about to expire (if you're anything like me, you never finish a bottle of dressing before it expires...), empty it into your Air Car and you're set for trip to San Diego.

For the full article, check here. I know I for one will be ready to pick up my main squeeze in my Air Car when they start sales in 2011.

"Upgrade your Grey Matter...

because one day it may matter" -Deltron 3030

I found this on Yahoo a bit ago, thought I'd share it with y'all.

Have you ever felt exasperated when you bumped into someone at the store but absolutely couldn't remember their name? Sure, it happens to all of us. Despite being the strongest computer on the planet, our brains do lapse. It's hard to blame them really. As humans, we spend much of or existence stuffing our brains with stuff.

No matter how powerful our brains are, they need recuperation time to be kept in shape. Think of it as a tune up for your brain. Skipping brain maintenance is as silly as the person wandering the parking garage because they forgot where they parked. Is that you? Are you that
person? If so, fear not; we are all that person at some point.

Now I am not a brain surgeon and I am not going to suggest you do
anything surgical or dangerous. I am however an astute student of human
behavior so I always look for simple ways to super charge my brain.
Here are some things you can begin doing as soon as today to begin the great brain tune up:

Eat Almonds
Almond is believed to improve memory. If a combination of almond oil
and milk is taken together before going to bed or after getting up at
morning, it strengthens our memory power. Almond milk is prepared by crushing the almonds without the outer cover and adding water and sugar to it.

Drink Apple Juice
Research from the University of Massachusetts Lowell (UML) indicates that apple juice increases the production of the essential neurotransmitter acetylcholine in the brain, resulting in an increased memory power.

Sleep well
Research indicates that the long-term memory is consolidated during sleep by replaying the images of the experiences of the day. These repeated playbacks program the subconscious mind to store these images and other related information.

Enjoy simple Pleasures
Stress drains our brainpower. A stress-ridden mind consumes much of our memory resources to leave us with a feeble mind. Make a habit to engage yourself in few simple pleasures everyday to dissolve stress from your mind. Some of these simple pleasures are good for your mind, body and soul.

-Enjoy music you love
-Play with your children
-Appreciate others
-Run few miles a day, bike or swim
-Start a blog
-Take a yoga class or Total Wellness routine

Exercise your mind
Just as physical exercise is essential for a strong body, mental exercise is
equally essential for a sharp and agile mind. Have you noticed that children have far superior brainpower than an adult does? Children have playful minds. A playful mind exhibits superior memory power. Engage in some of the activities that require your mind to remain active and playful.

-Play scrabble or crossword puzzle
-Volunteer
-Interact with others
-Start a new hobby such as blogging, reading, painting, bird watching
-Learn new skill or a foreign language

Practice Yoga or Meditation
Yoga or Meditation relives stress. Stress is a known memory buster. With less stress, lower blood pressure, slower respiration, slower metabolism, and released muscle tension follows. All of these factors contribute significantly towards increases in our brainpower.

Reduce Sugar intake
Sugar is a non-food. It’s a form of carbohydrate that offers illusionary
energy, only to cause a downhill slump once the initial burst has been worn off. Excess intake of sugar results in neurotic symptoms.
Excess sugar is known to cause claustrophobia, memory loss and other
neurotic disorders. Eat food without adding sugar. Stay away from sweet drinks or excess consumption of caffeine with sugar.

Eat whole wheat
The whole wheat germs contain lecithin. Lecithin helps ease the problem of the hardening of the arteries, which often impairs brain functioning.

Eat a light meal at night
A heavy meal at night causes tossing and turning and a prolonged emotional stress while at sleep. It’s wise to eat heavy meal during the day when our body is in motion to consume the heavy in-take. Eating a light meal with some fruits allows us to sleep well. A good night sleep strengthens our brainpower.

Develop imagination
Greeks mastered the principle of imagination and association to memorize everything. This technique requires one to develop a vivid and colorful
imagination that can be linked to a known object. If you involve all your senses - touching, feeling, smelling, hearing and seeing in the imagination process, you can remember greater details of the event.

Control your temper
Bleached food, excess of starch or excess of white bread can lead to nerve grating effect. This results in a violent and some time depressive behavior. Eat fresh vegetables. Drink lots of water and meditate or practice yoga to relieve these toxic emotions of temper and stressful mood swings.

Take Vitamin B-complex
Vitamin B-complex strengthens memory power. Eat food and vegetables
high in Vitamin B-complex. Stay away from the starch food or white bread, which depletes the Vitamin B-complex necessary for a healthy mind. I don't believe these are that tough. If you find yourself increasing stumped, give a couple of these a try.

I already incorporate tips 1, 3, 4, 5, 8, 9, 10, 11 & 12. Damn sugar is my roadblock, especially when Starbucks is involved.

I'd print and frame these, but then I'd prolly be total poser....

Someone very dear to me linked me to this site today. Pretty cool posters here, most of them from gigs I wish I'd had a chance to go to. Why do so many bands go to crap-size towns in other states but not come to Phoenix?

Nerd Crush

So, I was tooling around on Yahoo earlier and came across a feature about "TV's Top Single Gals". While I hadn't thought about this previously, I do find it remarkable on a socioeconomic scale that there are a considerable number of TV shows with single-women as the main character, and consider it a vastly welcome change. My appreciation might also be enhanced by the photos that accompanied the feature and the way they reminded me of my nerd-crush on Tina Fey

Motivation for your Workweek

Yeah, meant to blog this yesterday but was in a rush before work. Also, I couldn't decide between the two. The each seem equally vulgar yet poignant.

Banksy's Pet Shop an d Grill

As the name suggests, this video can be pretty awkward to say the least, probably upsetting and maybe offensive. Then again, it's probably a vegan's dream message to communicate.

Banksy is my favorite street artist. I agree with those who say that Shepard Fairey (think Obey, Walk the Line, Elephunk, etc) started street art, and Banksy picked up the flag.


NOTCOT: Banksy's Village Petstore & Charcoal Grill from Jean Aw on Vimeo.

A Year Ago

A Couple re-runs from my old myspace blogs. these are things I posted about year ago















































Get Sustainable.
It's not an option.

R.I.P. Easy Money

I don't really think everyone knows this, but since the Industrial Revolution, America has not had a "steady economy". Our economy is based entirely on continual growth. When we see a downturn, it's akin to saying "Well shit, I was getting a raise of 10% each year, but I only got a 7% raise this year". This is not a 3% downturn, it's a natural correction.

I give up though, some people will still be confused.

I did find this relevant image on Wooster. Check it out.

10 Things "not" to say on a date.

So, you should probably know up-front that I like to laugh when things get awkward. Romantic faux-pas in a movie: I'm laughing while others flinch. Weird Outbursts in a Social Setting: I'm biting my lip to keep from bursting with glee.

That said, I know that not everyone has learned to see this side of things. Also, I understand that some people find dating (particularly first-datery) to be nerve-racking. Therefore, I thought I'd be helpful and re-post these tips I gleaned from Shine on Yahoo.

No, these aren't tips I use/used. In fact, I probably fly in the face of this advice. For those of you playing at home, maybe keep score and track how many of these I violate....

Getty Images

First dates are stressful, period. You don't want to lie or stretch the truth per se, but you also don't want to send your date running off to hail a cab before you've even ordered the cheese plate. Basically, the goals of a successful first date are to reveal that adorable, endearing part of yourself, learn more about the stranger sitting across from you, and to see if there is any connection between you two crazy kids. Obviously, it's important to be honest, but some of the more intimate parts of you are well, sorta personal, and no one's forcing you to spill all the beans. (Besides, everybody is intrigued by a little mystery and you want to save something for the second and third dates, right?) We don't really believe there are any hard and fast rules when it comes to dating, and despite what movies would have you think, there is no such thing as the "perfect date," so take these with a grain of salt. Still, here's hoping you find a couple of them helpful, and good luck out there.

1. "My ex is crazy."
There's a fine line between love and hate, but both are equally fueled by passion. If someone even mentions their ex on a first date, watch out, you could be entering into a three-way relationship. Brace yourself: drama ahead! Anyway, if you're not over your ex, keep it to yourself. Your date certainly doesn't want to hear about it.

2. "I would like to get married and have kids asap."
Slow. That. Roll. Whether you're a man or a woman, uttering those words automatically puts pressure on an already delicate, stressful meeting, not to mention the fact that it's a foolproof way to scare someone off and fast.

3. "Who are you voting for?"
There's a saying in the south about not bringing up politics or religion in polite company. Plenty of couples don't always share political (or religious) views, and learn to make things work. But when you're trying to make a good first impression, it's probably best to avoid overly emotional topics in order to avoid a sparring match. (Look at it this way, if you become a couple, you'll have plenty of opportunities to fight later!)

4. "Can you pay the check? I'm broke."
Hey, the economy is in the toilet. Of course you're broke. We're all broke. But common courtesy dictates that the person who did the date asking offer to pay the bill. Chances are, if your date has good manners, they'll over to split it or pay the tip. Let's face it, gone are the days where the guy automatically must pay for dinner or he's a loser. But no matter what the circumstances are, flat out asking your date to pay the bill is a major turn-off.

5. "What's your favorite TV show?"
C'mon, we can do better than that. Asking about hobbies and other interests can lead to great conversation, but the last message you want to convey is that your favorite activity is watching the tube with a tub of ice cream. Save talking about "America's Next Top Model" for the work water cooler or something.

6. "Where did you go to school?"
Believe it or not, many people didn't go to college, and totally resent being put on the spot with this tired old question. And while plenty of grads are happy to wax on and on about their "glory years" or whatever, it's probably better to ask something like, "Have you always lived here?" "How did you choose your career?" or another more general question that might lead you to discussing educational background. Again, it may seem strange, but for all kinds of reasons, a lot of people have negative knee-jerk reactions to this seemingly innocuous question.

7. "Can I take your picture?"
Creepy much? But yeah, I have girlfriends who've been waylaid by this gem. For real. Maybe it's the thought of him showing his buddies your photo and bragging about bagging you, or even the image of him fawning over your pic tacked up on one of those cray-cray serial killer wall collages. Either way, ick.

8. "I'm poly-(fill in the blank)"
There are folks who are polyamorous (def: the desire, practice, or acceptance of having more than one loving, intimate relationship at a time with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved); polygamist (def: the practice of marriage to more than one spouse simultaneously); and yes, some are even polyester salesmen (def: dudes who peddle chintzy wares). Right then. Unless you met that person on a "special" site devoted to that kind of stuff, chances are your date won't appreciate your um, open-minded ways.

9. "So I just got out of rehab."
So maybe you have some personal problems you've been working on. Perhaps you've been in therapy since you were 13 years old. Whatever the case may be, it's probably best not to introduce your new romantic interest to your BIG, SCARY ISSUES, at least not yet. Everybody has problems big and small, but the first date is more about showing off your personality, not painting yourself as a psychotic addict (even if you are, just a smidge). Note: If you are seriously in the midst of a personal crisis, and that includes excessive drug use and/or major psychological treatment, not to be all judgey, but you probably shouldn't be on a date right now.

10. "So ya wanna come back to my place?"
Not everyone is old-fashioned about first dates. The right time to sleep with someone is up to you, but numerous informal polls, um, around the office show that when a guy propositions a woman for sex on the first date, she tends to get skeeved, and when a girl does the same, many dudes are likely to file her in the one night stand category. Double standard? Sure. And yes, some couples do have sex on the first date and there is nothing wrong with that. But I think you know what I'm sayin'...

Remember how tough the 80's were?

Damn, those were some hard times....

- Everyone had to wear itchy cotton sweatshirts to stay warm, because global warming hadn't been invented yet, even if your shirt said Woody and you didn't look a thing like that guy from Cheers.
- Hairstyles didn't clearly indicate if you were Jewish or Italian, probably leading to some honestly mis-placed racism. ("Sorry, I thought you was... well, you know...one of them.. No hard feelings, ok? Say hello to your mutha for me", etc)
- Taggers didn't even have spray-paint, kids had to use their dad's shaving brush with an ink pack jammed on the end
- Truck hats were worn by the poor. Yeah, your mom said it was the same as the ones the Yankees wore on the field, but you always KNEW you were wearing half a hat.
- And Everyone had a friend in their crew who was known for his "wtf frown face"....



Actually, I just lifted this picture from Wooster Collective, my favorite Street Art Website. The image is from the new book Tag Town launching tomorrow.

What Luck!!!

Somehow I found two (2) robot-related blogs in one hour. Talk about your good-ass start to a weekend.

Fragmented by Maura Cluth. Check out her stuff for sale too. I sorta wish I had a wall-sized verson of one of her prints.

Nerdbots a married couple (*shut yo mouth*) who make some pretty freakin' sweet robo-pals. I was hooked when their banner said "we won't brag about our mental superiority".

New Words, New Sites

You know that saying "friend of a friend"? It usually goes something like this:

Average Person 1: "Soooo..... How'd you meet that sweet catch of your's?"
Clearly Awesome Person 2: "Oh, friend of a friend."
Average Person 1: "You're so lucky! Why can't I have that happen to me...."


Well, world, I give you a new, equivalent term: "Blog of a Blog"

One of the things I like best about using Blogger is the way you find things that you probably never would have seen otherwise, even with regular use of Yahoo or Google. For example, I was thinking about the sites that I have linked to my blog (the short list of them on the right-hand sidebar), and decided to see what was up with each of those blogs today. Then I thought I'd see what kind of other people they were linking two. Found out today that I am two degrees of separation from the following hilariousness:

Subversive Cross-stitch

OMG this shit is bananas! I'd say I need one of these for my (as-yet-unnamed) home, but it'd be tough to decide, sorta like picking a puppy from the pound and having to leave the rest there....




What Sucks....

I think the name says it all, but the guy's post about FaceBook was redonk!






So, when you're proudly displaying your "shut your whore mouth" needle-point artwork in your home, and your friend asks you "where did you ever find something like that", you can crisply retort, "Oh, Blog of a blog".

Beck's Back to Europe, sorta.

I just read about this today, but already I've seen four different articles about it, each of them vilifying Becks for wanting to loan to AC Milan. Now, I've condensed the article below, but you get the gist. Reading all the other articles about how "Beckham is disrespecting American and MLS" made me want to puke. They sound a lot like those mewling, needy boyfriends... "if you walk out that door.... I'll be here waiting but I'll pout about it and be passive-aggressive for years..."

Anyways, the shocker to me is that he's joining AC Milan. Having already played for the top teams in England and Spain, I guess Italy would be next on the list, but look at all the talent Milan already has. They made Semi-Finals in Champion's League last year with Kaka, Pirlo, boy-faced Pato, and they already added Ronaldihno (perhaps the greatest since Beck's left Man U) in July. I just feel bad for the rest of Europe now.

MILAN, Italy (AP)—AC Milan is close to signing David Beckham in a loan deal that would allow the Los Angeles Galaxy midfielder and former England captain to play in Italy for a few months starting in January.

With the Major League Soccer season in the United States nearly over, Beckham is eager to join another club in Europe so he can remain in shape and keep his place on England’s team for World Cup qualifying. England coach Fabio Capello has said he will not pick players who are not active.

“We’ll sign him for a few months and then he’ll go back. Beckham has chosen Milan,” Galliani said at Malpensa airport before flying to a UEFA Cup match. “Our team is very competitive and will remain as is, but Beckham is something different and intriguing.”

“David’s intention is to maintain his fitness and keep himself eligible for England’s selection,” he said. “He very much remains a Galaxy player and he would be in Los Angeles for the start of the 2009 MLS season.”

Beckham would join a squad at Milan that features Brazil standouts Ronaldinho, Kaka and Alexandre Pato, plus Italy’s Andrea Pirlo and Gennaro Gattuso.

Political Hottie (that's not Sarah Palin)

Now, my blog is clearly heavy on the Sarah Palin is a babe-o-rama vibe, but in actuality, I do not want to convince anyone who to vote for. I'd much rather settle for nudging everyone to learn about the issues and vote intelligently, for whichever candidate you like. You're picking a President here, not a sweater or a cocktail, so I implore you not to vote based on the packaging or hype or whatever, but on your own research and gut-feeling.

That said, if you're total apolitical, just scroll down and you can read my post of about Halloween. (Unless you want to say that giving away candies to strangers is akin to socialism, then I just can't help you, you dire old bitter slugface.)

The intent of Random & Awesome (R&A, if you will) is to just share with the audience whatever happens to catch my whim at the moment. Clearly, for the next few weeks, the big news will be the election and the economy. I'm broke, so I really can't give any tips about the economy, but I CAN give you tips about where to find a smokin' hot First Daughter-to-be.

Have I told you that Megan McCain is on my very short list of blondes that could be my third wife? If not, here's a brief run-down of where we're at today:

(in no particular order)
- Heidi Klum
- Megan McCain
- Scarlett Johansenn
- Kelly Ripa

Sadly, I had to remove Sarah Chalk (sp?) since she should no longer be appearing on my favorite show.

I digress, as per usual....

Here are a few pics I lifted from Megan McCain's blog site today (oh yeah, she's cute AND blogs).





















Evidence of Hottines #1: Multitasking while Smiling














Crap, I never come up with the cool sign-sayings. Witty bastard...
















More Megan. Yes, her dad looks a bit confused about his cell phone in the background, but so do some other people's parents I know....

















No Cause for Alarm, really. What you may think is Johnny Mac slugging a woman in the face, is really an everyday occurrence worldwide. People with round-eyes tend to think that those of us with slant-eyes are "looking at them funny" and get peevish about it. We just learn to deal with the problem as life goes on. Sometimes you need to preface things with "Hi, my name is Ryan. My eyes aren't closed, their just slanty".

















If I never told you I was born in Maine, here's a little primer on how my home-state rocks: Meg Mc + Pizza + in a bar. Tell me you wouldn't be in a better mood to talk about America's future with a slice and a pint in front of you. Plus, Maine is just like Massachussets, without all the asshats and dickwads.

B The W

anybody else think the girl in the "plug & socket" outfit in my costume post looks like a more-achievable version of Claire Danes?

Talk about Scary!!!

I came across this image while scanning photobucket for "halloween costume".

Talk about "tricked"!



Nice touch with the pepsi machine back-drop. Couch, pepsi machine, material on the walls... This dude/thing wore that to someone workplace?? I don't have words...

Costume??? No Idea!!!

So, as your friendly neighborhood calendar has likely told you, Halloween is casually approaching, and, while I am not 100% sure what the plan is for that evening, I figured I should get in the spirit and determine what costume fits me best.

My "plan" (and I say "plan" because you should know I never really plan anything, just make up ideas as I go) since last year was to go as my favorite Manchester United footballer, Cristiano Ronaldo:





As you can see, I am forced to admit that the resemblence is not-quite-there. Plus, his proto-mullet/hawk (see below) sorta makes me think I won't get laid until I shave it off.


So, ruling that out, I'm down to the following classy choices:



Also, while the Costume Website said that last one was "Morpheus from The Matrix" it looks more like "R. Kelly from The Sex Crime", so that one's out of the running already.

This one is hella funny to me, but I think that if I propose this suit, I'll find my plug back on teh market, in need for a new socket.

You do have to dig both the pun and the simplicity, though.....

Eskimo, how you doing

Ha ha. This is almost as funny as the one with Natalie Portman rapping.

Hilarious

S. P. is Smokin'!

Mr. Breakfast

Random Website for your enjoyment: Mr. Breakfast.

Hailed as "All Breakfast All the Time", Mr. Breakfast (Senior Desayuno for mis amigos espanols) gives 1 - 5 Golden Egg ratings of local breakfast places. If you really want details, you can drill-down that they give you price information and even "Refill Rating". I think this guy is serious about his breakfast.

Awake already.

Played an away game last night and now I'm awake before anyone else. This is usually an awkward time for me because I seem to sleep less than everyone else, and yet, it would be rude to just wake up and start moving about while people are sleeping. Damn sun, hitting my eyes, making me to want to get up and get some coffee! So, to pass the time I thought I'd upload a couple pictures from last weekend. There are many more pics for me to go through, but I really like these two.

Your's Truely, geared up and ready to go. As you can see, I brought the guns, in case there was any trouble.

I really like this picture. You can almost see my eyeballs.

Bitter-Sweet Goodbyes

In recognition of today's last-ever game at Yankee's stadium, a brief reminder of the greatness that played there.

Babe Ruth, Home-Run champ for 34 years. Sole posessor of the only sports record that counts. Show me someone else that could hit 60 home runs in that short of a season, fueled only on beer and hot-dogs. McGuire and Bonds can kiss my ass. I'll be plenty happy when A-Rod takes back the All-Time Home-Run Record in a few years.

Lou Gehrig, hit 50 homers the same year the Babe hit 60. His record for most base-hits in Yankee Stadium was only broken just last week by Derek Jeter. Gehrig was the first athelete to have his jersey retired when he bowwed out less than two years before his death to ALS.

Updated with photos

as promised, some photos from the shmance evening.

Mas Photos

I guess the last post got full, the damn interweb wouldn't let me add anymore photos.

So, now, ready for some random snap-shots?

I don't know what vibe Crystal was selling, but Anie wasn't having it and I was laughing my ass off.

Excuse Me... I just wanted to say, the back of your head is ridic'ilous!

This is a fucking good combo. Why didn't I think of this?!?

Oddly, prolly the best pic of my Yankee-Doodle hat and Nicole's the one wearing it.

Contrary to popular belief, I did not come up with the song that goes with the hat.

Holly must have forgotten that I'd be needing those intact later...

This picture is great on many levels.

See me there? I play some great background. I think Crystal saw this and tried to line her face up with mine. Very Hitchcock-like.

As the pictures show, great times were had by all. GG on the great party.



And the Winner is.....

Recent Pics

A bevy of pictures from the "Hat Party" for your consideration:

The original plan was just a get a beer. Then someone want to take my photo. Then Anie & Megan snuck in...

Car Bombs in Red Cups for the win. I promised not to post the picture of someone (drunkie) spitting it back out.

I posit that this is the greatest action shot ever taken. 1.3 seconds after this frame, Anie knocks Holly's drink all over herself and create a puddle of Foot-Juice. Don't worry, this did not deter further table-dancing. Or maybe do worry; who dances in Foot Juice??

This is me trying to have not-slant-eyes. I apologize for my attempt at stubble. I also apologize if staring into my eyes in this picture has hyponotized you.